Can you think of any changes that will take place if Linux dethrones Windows and Microsoft goes broke? Well, I just thought it over and these ideas came to my mind. Most of them are fictional and are meant for amusement only. Hope you enjoy!
- Penguins will be a happy lot. They will send lots of flying kisses from the Antarctic. Some will even swim north to meet their celebrity cousin, Tux.
- The guys at Google will be on wild celebration. Some of the Microsoft folk will join Al Qaeda to drop bombs on the Google office.
- Antivirus companies will close down. Headed by Symantec, they will open their own bakeries.
- Less PC users will die from the shock of getting a blue screen of death, or on finding all their important documents and photos missing.
- On the contrary, death rate among illegal hackers will rise surprisingly. Some will start funding Microsoft to revive the good old days of Windows. Some others will try to target Linux, only to be pecked away by Tux.
- Ships usually sink due to storms, faulty technique or accidents with icebergs. But now more ships will sink due to overloading of the free Ubuntu ShipIt! CDs.
- Intel Pentium will rise again – most Linux distributions run super fast on Pentium IV and 512 MB RAM without ever slowing down!
- Steve Ballmer will be caught using Linux on his PC. Reason – Windows Vista too heavy on the poor guy’s pocket!
- Devastated, Adobe will slash the price of Photoshop from $700 to $7.00. People will still prefer the free and open source GIMP.
- Linux users will become game maniacs as the gaming companies turn their attention to Tux.
- Names like Internet Explorer and Windows Media Player will be featured in history books.
- Computer viruses will disappear. Biological viruses will be happy again – they will be no longer ignored like they were in the days of the computer virus. A search for “virus” in Google will display results for biological viruses, and not the computer ones, at the top. To show their gratefulness to Linux users, the viruses will stop spreading AIDS.
- Netscape Navigator will rise again and will be an instant hit. However, there will be no enmity with Firefox or Flock.
- Torrent sites like The Pirate Bay and Mininova will join already dead rival Demonoid, in Hell.
- Apple’s happiness at Microsoft’s ruin will be cut short by Linux’s domination. However unlike Microsoft, Linux will recognise Apple for it’s rock solid operating system, Mac OSX.
Alas! Linux is not going dominate the PC world and Microsoft is not becoming a “who-cares?” entity in the foreseeable future . I have been a full time Ubuntu user myself for almost a year and I find it pretty solid, but there are definitely some small improvements needed to make it a serious contender of Windows. And Windows users, please don’t think I hate Windows or anything! I like both Windows XP and Windows Vista. As you can see, PC Ton!c is almost entirely about Windows.
P.S. Oh yes, I had Chemistry yesterday and I have done pretty well. Today, I was reading Physics since 9 in the morning (it’s 3:00 PM now), so I decided to take a break and write down something funny. Hope you liked it!
I’ve been around and read enough blogs to understand that when someone mentioned “I’ve been using Linux ….. Ubuntu ….”
that’s the end.
If your world view of Linux is ubuntu, there’s a high chance that you’re just one of those fan boys who acts like you’ve know too much .. LOL
Where did you get the idea that his world view of Linux is Ubuntu?
@Mr. Anonymous,
I neither see the world of Linux as Ubuntu nor do I pretend to know too much about Linux…I just wanted to say that Linux will have to upgrade itself a bit more to be a serious contender of Windows – it will take more than just a good nice OS to woo the Windows users because Windows is pretty good itself and most people use pirated versions of it, which don’t cost a damn bit either
@Danny
Thank you for the comment.
I would take issue with your comment ‘Windows is pretty good itself…’ LOL, but I still use it. Good post BTW. Need a laugh every now and then, and also, hope u did well in your exams.
> Torrent sites like The Pirate Bay and Mininova will join already dead rival Demonoid, in Hell.
This is nonsense, you’re not much of a TV show / film fan, huh?
Is this a dream?
It is. It’s the type of dream where you can participate to make it come to life.
Thanks for the essay. It was enjoyable.
I don’t know if you were serious or not about the Pentium IV and 512MB comment. Just FYI – that is exactly the setup I have at home on my “powerful” Linux system. It runs everything I want/need just fine – usually several things at once. A check of the system monitor usually shows plenty of RAM left.
The only time I’ve ever wished for some more CPU horsepower was when I had to render a bunch of images (jpg format) into digital video (dvi I think it was), then put together a whole mpeg clip from the dvi’s. I was making a video CD from a bunch of stills…
But 99.9% of the time I just run my OpenOffice apps, Firefox, Thunderbird, Pan, and some custom C++ and Java based programs… Note, the Java is a mix of compiled gcj stuff and interpreted. (ie. in a big JVM)
It is not a dream. It will come to be. And there will be no more MS OS’s, for they will have been torn asunder by all the Linux distros of the world. And the world will be free, as in freedom. And Richard Stallman shall rule this free land. And from this once bloated and barren land will spring a wealth of software, and it will be great once again.
@dave
I am a TV show fan…but I get most of them with Miro – it’s free, open source and legal. http://getmiro.com/
@jose_x
Yes, it’s kind of a dream.
@Anonymous
I was not joking in that part…I know that Linux distros run great in P4 and 512 MB RAM..but you have said a few things I didn’t know about
@Bob
Your future vision is great, but you shouldn’t be too anti-Microsoft either…they have got some big accomplishments as well
@Everyone
Thank you SO much for leaving a comment here.
This is just stupid and childish, grow up.
Great essay!
Thanks for making my day
This is fun list. Good job.
But I have to spoil your fun. If Linux were to rule the world (as it will one day) viruses would be written for Linux instead of Window$, sad but true.
btw. I’m writing this comment from my PIII 1GHz 512RAM Xubuntu machine.
@Anonymous
Yeah I knew this would look childish to most adults because it does look a bit grumpy even to me and I am 17…but quite a few people seem to like it! Anyway, thanks for the comment!
@Kosmix
I am honoured I made your day! Hope you have a really great one!!!
@Bermann
That’s definitely sad but true…viruses will appear in Linux if it gets attention; but then it will fun to see the hackers toiling through the complex Linux code and learning ways to abuse it – I am sure many will give up their profession!
@Everyone
I just don’t know how to thank you all! This has just been a MASSIVE turn out so far – 1200 visitors in less than 2 days! Just keep coming!!!
♥
My hopes for a Linux world is that end-users start contributing more to free software. For endusers, free software is something distant, cold that refers to coding: Free Software definition reads “you have the right to change a program”, that is access to source code, modify the source and redistribute it. But for an end user that knows nothing about “source code” it is very hard to contribute to the community.
I would like every kind of women & men having different occupations to start giving something back.
Related links:
Comment to the post “A lot of GNU/Linux-users don’t care about freedom”, explaining what freedom is to end users:
http://tuxtoday.wordpress.com/2008/03/02/im-sad-to-say-a-lot-of-gnulinux-users-dont-care-about-freedom/#comment-750
“Freedomware [free software from enduser perspective] calls contributions from artists, end users “”http://www.thetuxproject.com/node/286
Er, I don’t really get this comment:
“If your world view of Linux is ubuntu, there’s a high chance that you’re just one of those fan boys who acts like you’ve know too much .. LOL”
That’s kind of an elitist look at it. We’re all Linux users in some way, shape or form, we’re just using distros we like the most, because we’re the most comfortable with that.
I use Ubuntu, and I love it. It’s got the best bits of Debian, and it’s simple enough to set up for even the dumbest of people. It’s user-friendly, but at the same time, you can make it as complicated as you want to.
It’s really amusing. Even though I have read it for several times. But it’s a pity that only those who understand English can have fun. I’d like to translate it into my native language so as to share it with more people. And, Ashutosh, I have sent you a mail to ask for your permission to post the translated version on a local community web site when my translation is almost done. I admit that I am a little bit hasted. But so far, I do not get any reply from you. So I guess that you do not allow it, eh? I am sorry to jump into such an unhappy conclusion. It’s really really a pity.
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DAY
@Anonymous
You can OF COURSE translate it into any language you want!!! Sorry I haven’t checked my mail for one week…
I am always amused by folks who use, condone or can’t conceive of using anything other than MS Windows (any flavor). How freely they sling the fanboy word around. Are you a MS Window’s fanboy? Are you disturbed or annoyed by people who chest thump, do cart wheels or wear Tux suits because they are excited about Linux? Do you think that MS Window’s prominence on the desktop means it is the only way users should compute? The world of computing is so much bigger than MS, and there are other solutions. The tiny (in appearance) nation of Linuxville should boast because of what we have discovered and enjoy. Linux is as wonderful in front of the computer as it is behind the computer.
If you want to contribute to the community and you don’t code (write programs), you can write books, tutorials and user videos about all the great applications you have in Linux. There is lots of stuff about the GIMP. but what about Xara Xtreme, Krita and mtPaint? If you find an application particularly useful, exclaim it and explain it. You can even make money offering professional support services, migration plans and other things if you have the knack.
Why is MS Vista getting cautious looks and Ubuntu rave reviews? The emperor really has no clothes and the rest of us are donning Tux suits, lol. My wish for Linux, is that the Linux applications become used and explained by real users. This would help everyone because Linuxville is a real community.
@mojonson
You have got some good points, but I don’t understand this near-hostile attitude towards Windows. Windows is the top desktop OS for some reason, people using it are not dumb and insensible. I think die hard Linux fans should stop throwing out one thousand points why Vista is bad. Windows is the leader and Linux will go nowhere if it’s users upkeep their constant revolution against the leader.
Sorry if I sound hostile or overly mocking and perhaps I am venting some anger, typical fanboy stuff. But kingdoms are usually taken by force even if it is by being a just little assertive. Seems Windows users will forever endure suffering at the hands of the leader. But to complain about a few who are elated over Linux, someone pay me the hush money.
In my local library there must be 200+ books on MS OS and softwares. There are 8 older books on Linux. It was announced that Vista was flawed, yet our library bought 50 books on Vista. They were on the shelves before the product was in the stores.
You have to examine the ways a product is marketed and the mindset of PC users.
Not having the advertising machine or marketing wizards or bank roll of Microsoft, how does Linux get in the public’s mind. How do you get past user inertia (habits)? The word of mouth of actual users is the ground that Linux is promoted from. Then Linux was designed and developed with and along side the internet, so on the internet Linux is on home turf. It may resemble an annoying protest march or a coup, is noisy, arrogant, defiant, but it all is about getting the attention and forcing the acknowledgment. MS doesn’t endorse diplomacy and most Linux users aren’t passive but passionate. I also think the press should be charged with inciting a riot because they always ask questions that inflame the debate. They shot first with “is Linux ready for the desktop?” and MS users began to express why it is not. Was that near-hostile also?
On the other side of the coin, maybe Linux users should channel their energies to writing books, tutorials and user videos of all the great applications found in Linux. Then we should embrace MS technology and users until we are assimilated into the mainstream. We should not be different, not compete and we should quietly co-exist or go away. We should promote dual-booting or virtual machines instead of domination by installation. We should not attempt to introduce to users new stuff on the market. Heck, the green car is a myth while the gray car last longer and takes 10 years to finance. Pardon my way of putting things, but after all I am a Linux fanboy. Now if you want to better understand the revolution, watch “The Code Linux”, ” Revolution OS”, “The Free Software Movement” on YouTube and read “the Cathedral and the Bizarre” by Eric S. Raymond. You will begin to understand, it’s not a jihad, just business.
So….Ubuntu = Luser? No, I don’t think so. I use Linux and BSD at home and Windows XP at work (company policy). My job requires testing the top 4 Linux distros, Mac OS-X, FreeBSD, and occasionally Windows. Just because a person prefers Ubuntu doesn’t mean they are some sort of idiot or newbie. I don’t choose to use Suse anymore because of Novell’s deal with M$. Same as for Redhat. My servers run FreeBSD and I support numerous XP, Vista, and 2k systems.
kinda sad that people mistake popularity in one OS distro for fan-boyism.
how hard is it to add code that would allow your OS to accept downloaded programs and to install them? What about programs on CD, how does Linux handle them? Not at all?
I don’t know any person who has used any Linux-distros and facing problems with viruses and worms. I pretty sure that hackers want to collapse Linux-distros also and they have tried it hard. Think about if someday they will manage to knock down Linux. What a big joy in Redmond. And i’m sure it might be the greatest dream of Ballmer.
However Linux is much better OS than Windows. It’s not just that 90%-2% situation. It’s better and that hard fact must be accepted by windows users.
Real success is finding your lifework in the work that you love.